The Uncertainty Principle

In the physical context, it means that the product of the uncertainty of the position of an object and its momentum can never be less than half a h-bar.

In the everyday context, it means that the product of the difference in the number of times you've had sex and the difference of your penis length / pussy tastiness can never be less than the half H-ness (the bar represents the censor, but observe how it fails to cover the long stem of the 'h') of all the stuff you've fapped to.

Obviously, this is wrong in many ways.