Sleeping Away

When I came to
I found myself
In a hospital ward
Hooked to a respirator

When I was younger
I thought death was painful
I fantasized about the cleanest way to die
Or if I would like to be attached to the soulless abominations
Mulling over these
Gave me and others
Headaches

But on my death-bed
I didn't really care
It didn't matter if I died now
Or had some more to live

Opening my eyes a squint
I faintly saw
My daughter
Negotiating with the doctor
My elder son
Sitting beside me reading a book
I want them to smile

Everyday